By Cindy

I’m 33 and I live in northern Illinois. I have a 9-year-old son and I’ve been in a relationship with a great, caring woman for nearly 10 years. I also just gave birth to twin boys with a wonderful man. I was his gestational surrogate.

A few years ago, my partner and I were dismayed at the number of people who wanted children but couldn’t have them on their own. These are people who would make great parents and deserved the opportunity. So we just figured we’d like to help.

We found Alternative Reproductive Resources through our local newspaper and decided to give them a call. The process was wonderful, and we were made to feel more like being part of their family than just a client. We met one gay couple, and were excited to get started, but it just didn’t pan out. Then we met our match.

We certainly weren’t going to limit our choices based on something as trivial as whether the prospective parents were gay or single or a different race. In fact, our intended parent was a single guy who hadn’t found anyone yet but decided he didn’t want to wait any longer to have children. He and my partner and I hit it off immediately, as if we’d been friends for years. We could tell he’d make an excellent parent – the man exudes “small-town goodness” from his pores.

We let our family and friends know our decision and there were some obvious concerns, especially from my mom and stepdad. After providing them with some more information, though, everyone has been extremely supportive. To a small extent, I think we also opened the eyes of the gay and lesbian community. Lesbian couples are the perfect surrogates because they’re usually more open-minded about non-traditional families. We’re a group that has experienced an unsettling amount of discrimination with regard to adoption and marriage, so less-than-conventional families are kindred souls. Our friends got a thrill out of watching my pregnancy progress.

When the end of November rolled around, I began to get nervous. My C-section was scheduled for December 3. I had no reason to be concerned though. My partner was holding my hand the whole time. Two beautiful, healthy boys popped right out, two minutes apart, and our intended parent’s life changed. The most rewarding experience of my life, besides my own son being born, was seeing this new father hold his sons. His mother couldn’t stop thanking me.

After it was all over, my partner and I decided we’d definitely do it again. (We’re agreed, however, that we want no more of our own!) We’ve already been able to see the boys once since the delivery and their father is adjusting quite well. We intend to stay in contact with the family, even if it’s just the occasional Christmas card or school photo.

This experience was exactly what we had hoped for. So many worthy people are out there looking for help in creating their own family. An open mind is all they need to make their lives complete.

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